Vicky Balfour Transcript
Welcome to another episode of Rest Days Community Podcast. In this week's episode, I interview Vicky Balfour, who was one of our most requested guests for season two. Our conversation was so enjoyable, and I think you'll be able to see why. Vicky is brilliant with words. She's able to string together sentences that perfectly capture the themes of this podcast.
We talk about the winding path of life, covering rest, moving our bodies, and responsibilities. If you're listening to this podcast, I'm sure you're well aware we never know what's around the corner. But Vicky has found ways to prepare herself for whatever may be there. She's carved out a space for herself that is ever-evolving and being adapted to suit her needs and those of others.
Her warmth and kindness seeped through the screen in our remote recording, and I hope that you can feel it through the stories she shares in this episode
Rhona: Hi, Vicky. Welcome to Rest Days Community podcast. It's so nice to have you here. Um, you were on my list of people to drop a message to, um, but also when I was asking people who they might like to hear on the next season, we've got a few requests for you, so I'm sure the listeners will be very happy to hear your stories.
Vicky Balfour: Oh, thank you so much. It's fantastic to be here and always lovely to hear that you've been asked, asked for. So, um, no, it's a great honor. Thank you for having me.
Rhona: There's so many things I'd love to talk to rest days related with you. Um, but I guess I I've seen a lot of stuff that you've done and I've seen a lot of the advocacy work you do, but I don't actually know very much about you. Um, so tell me about you. Where did you grow up?
What's your relationship with the outdoors? How did it all begin for you?
Vicky Balfour: So I grew up in a place called Lymington on the south coast of the uk, um, just opposite the isle of White. And I grew up with a tremendous amount of freedom, which was bliss. I mean, I think it was partly growing up in the sort of late seventies, eighties, and so on, but it was also the way I was brought up.
We, always sailed. Never fancy big boats, but just lovely little practical boats. So from a young age, I was off rowing and exploring creeks and cycling, and I had a little boat. In a town nearby or village nearby, which I was allowed to cycle to on my own and things. So yeah, the outdoors and I was a, yeah, guide scouts or Venture Scouts and things.
It was, in fact, I was cycling with, um, Nic Carass from the New Forest Off Road Club recently, and we were in the New Forest 'cause that's where I grew up. And I sort of said, do you know, we used to play wide games at night with Venture Scouts in the winter on the, in the forest. And we'd basically be dropped at one location in the forest and told to get to another and it was just, it was bonkers.
I mean, I'm sure they're not allowed to do it now, but it was so much fun. The freedom was insane. So yeah, the outdoors has always, always been part of my life. Um, and then, yeah, just uni in London. Met my husband, uh, when I was there and, um, he's a doctor, so we sort of stayed in London while he did all his.
To junior medical stuff and then ended up in Kent about 16 years ago. So yeah, it's, it is. So I've, I, I, when we had our children, I was working in PR in London and then was made redundant, uh, when I was pregnant with our second child, which actually ended up being a bit of a blessing. Unbeknownst to me because we had no idea she was going to be born with disabilities.
And then of course she was, and actually at one point we were under 13 bits of NHS. I was sort of, I knew every single specialist hospital in London, like the back of my hand. And it was, I literally was just going to hospital appointments the entire time. So yeah, it was crazy. There's no way I would've been able to work.
Um, but that's not always having a child with disabilities, being wife of a doctor, it's very easy to end up being lost and losing your own identity because you are literally just facilitating everyone else's life. Um, so that was really, yeah, it was, um, yeah, it was, looking back, it was crazy. I mean, it's, well, you know what medical training's like, but sort of, I mean, literally, my, our first child was born at one o'clock in the morning on a Saturday, and my husband.
Had to go on call eight o'clock on Saturday morning, and he didn't come home till eight o'clock Monday night, and I was abandoned in the hospital because I couldn't go home. It was just, it was ridiculous. It was, yeah. So those, those years, uh, yeah, it was,
Rhona: things are changing a bit in the medical system, that you know, somebody would've come in and covered him now and that he could have had the weekend with you if it was,
Vicky Balfour: yeah.
Rhona: it was now.
Vicky Balfour: I know it was, I mean, I look back at it and I just, and I wasn't even that young. I think I was 28, but I was so confused and I was like, am I allowed to feed my child? Am I, what do I do? It's, it's bonkers. Um, but yeah, so no, it's, um, so actually, yeah, and I had, we had, it took us a long time to find, we always sort of sailed with family.
We went on activity, holidays and things, but it wasn't until the children were slightly older and we realized that we could use a pull along trike for CC that, and that was sort of in lockdown really. And that was when suddenly the Outdoors opened up again because we could do things as a family.
So, um,
Rhona: Yeah, I mean, there's so much in there, isn't there? So at the point, um, I guess when you were living in London, um, slightly less outdoorsy lifestyle at that point, was it, um, and so it already maybe, you know, got used to city life a little bit.
Vicky Balfour: Yeah, we, I mean, we were very lucky. Both our families are from the New Forest, so we've always had a access to the outdoors, very easily access to sailing. I, we sailed with my parents. The children were able to enjoy that lifestyle that, that we'd enjoyed sort of at weekends. But yeah, we'd, I think when our son was, when I was pregnant with our son, we, we bought a little dinghy and we quite quickly realized that actually there was no way that we could sail it.
It sort of regularly between, yeah, between on calls and. Well, when you're breastfeeding trying to go out sailing in a wet or it was a dry suit then, I think. But um, yeah, trying to go out sailing when you need to express your milk is just really uncomfortable and unpleasant. So, um, yeah, so it, yeah, so we really, and I think by the time we were able to leave London, I think I was really, really missing, physically missing that access to the outdoors and that space and that green and yeah, and it's sort of, so it's, it was very much a coming home when we, when we did manage, when Al got a job in Kent and we came down here and it was suddenly we had the space again.
Um, it just took a while to, to find the way to the access the outdoors that worked for our family. So
Rhona: I think
Vicky Balfour: I.
Rhona: well, yeah, fa adding family into your relationship with getting outside, which, you know, if you have, are used to and use for your physical and mental health, it means you, you want to keep it. Um, but I think there's been a big boom in the, I mean relatively speaking in the last couple of years, that people have realized that cycling is maybe a way that you can do it and, and kind of have a bit of everything because you can attach things to a bike and tow them
Vicky Balfour: Yes. Yeah, completely.
Rhona: got a compliant human in the back, you know, a sleepy baby or a toddler, then that can work really nicely. Um,
Vicky Balfour: Yeah.
Rhona: but like you say, it's working out 'cause you obviously found that maybe sailing didn't work so well.
Vicky Balfour: Yes. Yeah, totally. I mean, it's sort of, and I think the joy of cycling is that you can, even if you're just cycling around your town, even if you're just doing a, a commute to, I dunno, going to the shops, going to the dentist, going wherever you can incorporate the outdoors. So where we live on the edge of Canterbury, if I've got time, and often I'll make, I'll, I'll sort of, I'll choose to make the time, but I, I, if I'm going to the doctors or the dentists, I'll go through the woods and into Canterbury from another side.
Um, 'cause Canterbury's a very much a walled round city. Yeah, so I'll just go around skirt, round the outside and then come in at a different point. So I've been able to, even if it's only 20 minutes, I've been able to get a bit of an out of a nature fix and then, then do the stuff I have to do. And for me, that's the way that it's really, it works really well because you can get those little micro doses of adventure, those little pockets of adventure, um, as I call them, just, yeah, without really disrupting everything else.
It's,
Rhona: that way of thinking about it, but that's also a very, it's a very Mum or a very, uh, womanly way to think about it. I think. How can I efficiently add in what I need?
Vicky Balfour: yes.
Rhona: going out to do a task that I must do anyway and I can make it also have another benefit as well.
Vicky Balfour: It's so true. And it's funny because I, so when I first got into cycling, it was very much about escape for me. I was very into mountain biking. I was working as a mechanic for chain reaction. And I was mechanicing at sort of, um, things like mega avalanche in France, which is a big, uh, downhill mountain bike race, which is amazing.
And so I was able to ride there, ride the race, do my work, fit it all in, and, and mountain bikes were my life. But it was incredibly hard to fit that in to the rest of the family. Um, and ironically, uh, probably something that a lot of families with, uh, young people with disabilities find that once Cece had left school, actually.
I've become far more hands-on. Again, I have to sort of take her to things. She's now 20, wants to do stuff at the weekends, and it's not so easy for me to just go away and get everyone else to do things. And, um, yeah, so I've had to, I've actually changed the way I ride and, and I was, yeah, I was sort of, it's not, it, it's living almost in alignment with where I am.
It's sort of, I still, I would love to go mountain biking. I'd love to go down on my enduro bike and do steep techie rides and go to the mountains, but I can't do that without an awful lot of extra work, um, for me. So riding an all terrain bike and just exploring my local woods and having fun there has become a really, sort of far more efficient way of getting my fix.
But yes, it is, it's a very, it's a very carer centric way of looking at life.
Rhona: Did. Um, so were you already a mountain biker, um, before you were a Mum or did you learn that after you were already looking,
Vicky Balfour: Yeah.
Rhona: for other humans?
Vicky Balfour: Yeah, so I actually only became a mountain biker about 10 years ago. It was, um, so we, we used to do, um, activity holidays with a company called Nielsen who were amazing because you go there and for Cece they gave her a one-to-one carer. And so she had a named person. And actually, because we used to go regularly with them, we would be able to request and they would bring in her carer if she wasn't working at the resort that we were going to.
So there was that continuity of care for her, and it was a chance we actually had a break. It was insane. We had two weeks where we could just be ourselves, which was amazing. Um, and I used to sail a lot on those holidays. And then I've had a, since pregnancy, I've had a once in fact. Since early twenties, I've had this ongoing issue with my meniscus cartilage in my knee, and I used to sail and hike out of the boat.
And of course there's the forces pulling on your knee with use of leaning over the edge of a boat. It just destroyed my knee. So one day I went and tried cycling and that was just, I just, I loved it. I absolutely, I got the same buzz that you do when you're planning on a dinghy With the wind sort of coming right across and going really fast.
I got that same sensation on a mountain bike. Um, and just that a bit, that freedom to just explore, get lost, go and try things out. Just play, uh, it is freedom. It's playing basically, so,
Rhona: That
Vicky Balfour: yeah.
Rhona: for, because a lot of the time as adults I think we forget that we can still
Vicky Balfour: Mm. Yeah.
Rhona: it's so good for us and, and and, and it makes getting, it makes movement and the boring task of exercising suddenly is really fun.
Vicky Balfour: Yes, it's so true. And it's really funny because I, so I, my Mum's got Parkinson's and my parents are both in their sort of mid to late seventies and I see physically I see with my Mum how her Parkinson's improves when she's been on a boat and she's doing all these sort of what to her mind is probably quite complex movement patterns and it's really reinforced it with me how important it is to keep moving and keep sort of, keep active.
And I mean, I'm lucky, I love weight training, so it's, I don't struggle to do it three times a week, but it's equally, having that underlying understanding of why exercise is so critical for our bodies just makes it a no brainer. And yeah, the play just makes it even more fun. It's.
Rhona: Yeah. I'm also so excited to hear that you got into mountain biking at that point. I think, um, I mean, again, I think this is slowly changing, but it, there are not that many, I guess, parents who take up a sport like mountain biking. Um, over the last few years I've been getting into mountain biking and I love it so much and I know to some people this is gonna sound insane, but I, I like it so much.
I'm at a point where I'm like, I don't know if I want to have a family because I, I might not continue mountain biking 'cause there's not that many people out there to look at and see who, who continue learning and enjoying mountain biking afterwards. And there's so many reasons for that, but it's so not, it's just amazing when you do see that that is actually possible.
It's just ideas that are stopping us in our
Vicky Balfour: Yeah. Yeah. Completely, completely possible. But also the other thing is that I've realized is that, 'cause when I was getting into mountain biking, there was a point where I was just like, oh my goodness, this is all I want to do. I don't want to do anything else but actually
Rhona: point.
Vicky Balfour: it, yeah. It's fab, enjoy it, embrace it.
It's great because the rewards are huge, but you still, you are. As things change, you might find that there are other kinds of biking that you love that at the Mument seem inconceivable to you. But actually there's, so, there's such a wide breadth of cycling out there and you don't lose those skills. And it could be that, say you, I mean like if I'm riding my rigid fork bike, um, so I haven't got any suspension on it.
Suddenly trails that would be quite boring on my Enduro bike become really fun and playful because the bike behaves totally differently. So, and I also think, um, and my son would probably agree, getting through teenage years, if you ride and your, your offspring ride so much easier. So much easier because you, you build a totally different relationship.
I swear we got through teenage years so much better because we had, I had huge respect for him. I learned to understand how he worked by watching him prepare for a jump or scoping out a trail or trying something out. And likewise, he got to be the adult to me and encouraged me in my jumping and my, and so on.
And then we could each equally when we needed to just turn around and tell each other to f off and just to stop it and blah, blah, blah. And it was, but it was, it worked. And you wouldn't have had, if you, it, it strips away without making you sort of, without stopping that parent offspring relationship. It gives you a space where you get to understand each other better and have more respect for each other.
And ultimately when you're trying to bring up humans, that's what you're looking for. So
Rhona: amazing. I think I, that's just like the coolest image ever that you and your son were out doing jumps together. Um,
Vicky Balfour: Yeah, he was always far better than me.
Rhona: well, yeah, but I think as well, you know, I, I hear a lot of people talk about how difficult it's to communicate with the teenage boy. So I, I imagine that really helped you guys' communication.
Vicky Balfour: Oh, hugely. Hugely. And I also learn to trust him. So, for example, yeah, because teenage boys do, they are naturally, there's a lot of hot air that comes out their mouths and a lot of sort of, not bravado, but just they aren't, as a Mum, you're like, oh my goodness, you're gonna get hurt on a night out, whatever.
But actually, if you've watched your, your child and you've learned to see how they approach danger. And how they approach risk, then you have a lot more confidence in an understanding in them in going out and so on. And you learn. You learn to trust them, you have to trust them. That's all we can do. And then that gives them the autonomy to behave in the way that they want to and show that they can be trusted.
So yeah, it's definitely,
Rhona: Yeah. That's amazing. I, I never even thought about it like that, but that's actually
Vicky Balfour: Hmm.
Rhona: isn't it?
Vicky Balfour: Yeah.
Rhona: and is he still into outdoors? You know, did, did, did that good footing, has it continued as an adult? Is he still, you know, enjoying activities and stuff?
Vicky Balfour: yeah. Absolutely. It's, and I mean like he's got a day off on Thursday and his girlfriend, they live with us and she's off on Thursday. And so we're going to drop Cece at her day service and then bike to the bakery and go for a bike ride and yeah, through the woods. And so, yes, it's, yeah, it's definitely, and likewise.
Their grandparents have all started cycling more, and so grandparents, grandchildren us in the middle will all cycle together. So it, it's, it really is a way to bring the whole family together. It's.
Rhona: is so wholesome. I love this. It's just amazing. That's so, so nice. Um, when obviously is, I love the idea of you all out together, but do you ever find that that's a lot of organizing and still responsibility and thinking about I need to bring this and that and make sure everybody turns up and they all have their helmets and, you know, is, is that sometimes also quite exhausting?
Do you still need your own time as well?
Vicky Balfour: Yes. Yeah, absolutely. It's sort of, yeah. So I will, I, I notice that I will make time to ride just myself and, um, yes, and it is, it's a balance. It's all a balance. And, um, I'll also make time to ride, like with friends. So this weekend, my friend Pete and I are going to go for a ride, and, and they, they, in my mind it's like, oh, so and so might want to come, or such and such might want to come.
And it's like, no, actually this is just for me and Pete to have a natter. We haven't caught up for ages. No, I'm not inviting everyone else. And it's bliss to just be yourself and just responsible for yourself. Um, so it is important to do that.
Rhona: have got those boundaries and that you recognize that. 'cause I do think it's very, if you're quite a people pleaser as well, or like you
Vicky Balfour: yes.
Rhona: people out, it's easy to think, oh well, Sally's at home on her own this weekend
Vicky Balfour: Mm.
Rhona: you know? But if you need that time for you, you
Vicky Balfour: Yeah, I think as I've got older, 'cause I'm 51 now, so as I've matured and, and had and been through sort of big emotional crises and sort of, and so on, um, yeah, around the time that I got into mountain biking actually, I think that's, and sort of that, that sort of well breakdown for want of another word after years and years of being a parent carer.
Um, I think what I've learned is that it is essential for me to have time for myself. It's not, and it's, and it really is. It's not selfish. It's hard, and it can, and I will, I do now sort of think that. Whilst I, I mean, I went and did the Badger divide a few years ago, and it just didn't, it didn't work for me.
It was the, it all sorts of reasons it didn't work for me. Um, but the biggest of which was that I really was miserable and I'd put in so much care and so much effort, and everyone else was having to pick up the pieces while I was away and juggle all my balls as well as their own. And, and it just didn't pay off.
And so I felt even worse because I wasn't happy. It was sort of, so I'm really, I need to make sure that when I do do the stuff for me, I think about it really carefully. And I, because it is very easy on social media and so on to look and go, oh yeah, I'd love to do that, but I tend to really interrogate myself.
And it's like, well, do you actually want to do that for you or do you just want to do it because it's on social media? Um.
Rhona: else is
Vicky Balfour: Yes. Because everyone else is doing it. And so it's sort of, if I can answer that, it's, it is properly for me, then great. I'll make the effort and I'll organize it and I'll do it. And, um, so like last year some friends and I went down to Munich for, um, brother in the Wild.
So Brother Make, they're based near us here in Kent, and they make these great sort of all terrain bikes. They make all sorts of bikes, but they had a festival down in Munich, and my brother lives in Munich, so I just thought, well, this is perfect. Um, and, uh, we went and saw him and, we were away from maybe four days, so the impact wasn't too great, but we had such a brilliant time and a real escape, so, yeah.
But it is, it's, it's balancing everyone's needs and happiness. Yeah. Probably too much people pleasing.
Rhona: ever considered how much weight there is on the decisions there. Um, you know, when you're responsible for other people and then you, um, have arranged all this, that then the little escape you have needs to be worth it. But,
Vicky Balfour: Yeah.
Rhona: yeah, that's a lot of pressure for
Vicky Balfour: Yeah.
Rhona: to,
Vicky Balfour: It's,
Rhona: sure you choose the right thing.
Vicky Balfour: it's, and my therapist would probably say that I'm absolutely daft to be overthinking it this much. I should just go and enjoy it or whatever. But it's, I think, I think the difference is when you, I mean, because the other thing is that this isn't standard for most parents. Most parents will have stopped having to think like this by the time their children are 12, 14.
It's sort of, this is very much the reality of being a parent carer to somebody who's 20. Um. And is still dependent and lives at home and, and has their own life as well. And so, because often, yeah, so for example, I want to go and do adventures on my own, but they're often adventures that Cece likes the sound of.
So I have to, I have to balance that. Um, but yes, it is, it's, yeah, there's a lot of juggling. A lot of juggling. Uh.
Rhona: So you also, you're a bike mechanic. How did that come
Vicky Balfour: Mm. So that came. So again, sort of through my childhood, I'd always been practical. My dad and my granddad always had sheds, did, they did work on boats, did work on cars, did work on whatever. It was just naturally it, especially my granddad, if you wanted something, I remember I wanted a skateboard, so he helped me make one.
It was always, yeah, we just just made things. So, and because I'm quite short, when I got into cycling, finding bikes that actually fitted me properly was quite hard. And also 'cause I didn't really know what I was doing. Um, so things like just started with simple things like having to change the stem that goes between the sort of the, the steerer column and the handlebars to bring the handlebars closer to me.
And I just, I really loved that freedom and that sort of sense of agency, that sense of empowerment and making something your own. Um, and it was around the time that I needed to, to, to have a sort of an existence outside the family. I, for my own sense of self, I, yeah, I needed to have that. And so I ended up doing voluntary work at our local bike shop for work experience and then yeah, decided to train as a mechanic.
So, um, yeah.
Rhona: because I mean, I'm just going to go with what stereotypes exist in the world here for a second. Did anything in your head say, I can't do that, because of where you were at that point. You know, a Mum, you're responsible for two people. Um, you're a woman, which. Shouldn't in any way stop you doing what you did, but I think there are people out there who that who would feel unsure because of those things. Or were you just able to be like, nah, I'm just gonna go try this thing. I fancy it.
Vicky Balfour: Yeah, I think, I mean, I've never been a big one for stereotypes. I'm not, and I think, yeah, I just, yeah, why can't I, and I, I dunno if it's a, if it's my upbringing or if it's, I don't know if it's, I could actually be watching my husband train as a surgeon.
Over the years I've seen how you just take sort of an 18-year-old and 20 years down the line, you produce a surgeon and it's like, well, actually all they've done is trained him and trained him and, well, he's trained himself, he's worked, but it is. None of us. None of, there's nothing that could stop. I mean, I probably couldn't be a supermodel, but that's generally 'cause I'm really short.
But it's, but there is no physical reason why any of us can't do anything. It's, um, yeah, it's just,
Rhona: is what people need to hear.
Vicky Balfour: yeah. It's,
Rhona: I
Vicky Balfour: you want to go and do it.
Rhona: in that though, because I sometimes speak to people and if I say like, I want to do this, for example, I was like, I wanna start podcast. And I was like, I don't know anything about podcasting, but you know, I didn't know anything about being a doctor 12
Vicky Balfour: Exactly. Yeah.
Rhona: So you just sort of, you do just take one step at a time. But I think sometimes people have never had that modeled for them maybe,
Vicky Balfour: Mm.
Rhona: they haven't seen that. They don't know that they themselves can do that. So yeah, I love that you spread that message and that you
Vicky Balfour: Yeah.
Rhona: go and do something completely different.
It's just so cool.
Vicky Balfour: Yeah, it's, yeah. And I think it's interesting because I do think, so when Cece, when our daughter was little, she, she couldn't speak, she didn't speak for a long time. And, um, we had a system called Portage, which supports families with special needs, which is amazing. Um, it's complete lifesaver. And the speech therapist who was working with her because she didn't.
Eat, um, sort of said, well look, why don't we try some Makaton? Um, which is sign language, but it's speech assisted li sign language. So it's not like going down the BSL route. There's still, you have capacity to build speech, but you use signing as well 'cause it's different bits of the brain. And so we went from being a family that had no idea of sign language, um, at all to, with Cece we sort of started, we literally started with yes no and more.
And then you built in and each time you'd learn those, you added in another word. And so she, Cece didn't speak till she was about six I think, but all the while we were able to communicate with her. And I think that experience of ending up in a world where you had, you were, it was completely alien to all of us.
But we realized that you could, I mean, I think. By the time she'd finished with Makaton, I mean, she still uses it now, but by the time at its sort of peak, I think we had about 180 signs. I mean, it was amazing and it was, but we'd gone from literally starting with three signs, and I think that taught me that actually you can do anything.
You just have to build it up slowly and just accept that you're learning and just take one step at a time. Um, yeah. So it's sort of, yeah, it's,
Rhona: That probably helped you learning to do something like mountain biking where, you know, uh, getting from I can pedal on a flat gravel road to I can go off a drop or a jump is so ti so many tiny steps.
Vicky Balfour: yes.
Rhona: and it's, and I think a lot, that's a thing that a lot of adults, I think struggle to get into mountain biking 'cause they look, 'cause we just see pictures of people doing
Vicky Balfour: Yeah.
Rhona: and then they'll, they're like, well, I wouldn't be able to do that and I have no idea how I would get there.
So I'm not gonna start.
Vicky Balfour: Yeah. Yeah, exactly. And I think, I mean, it's something that the media is aware of. I think it's still, it is something that's, that is being, or people are trying to make a difference with. Um, but it, we are still incredibly guilty of all the photos are of people doing sort of. Big jumps, lots of air, and so on.
Uh, and it's normally men doing that, and you don't always see the women who are doing it, but actually there's an awful lot of people who, I mean, it's who for whom that's not their idea of mountain biking and it never will be. And that is fine. And it's sort of, so for example, yeah, the bits, I mean, I, I like a certain height to drop, but it's not terribly high.
But I love it. It makes me feel really, it probably makes me feel as good as somebody going off a huge road gap. Because I'm just like, yeah, this is great. But equally for me, the bits that I really love are like the steep techie descents where I'm actually going quite slowly and really controlling the bike and moving my body to control the bike and sort of sorting out my mind.
But they don't come out on photos, so nobody wants to see that. It's sort of, and you can't convey it. And actually, so I think that's the big, that's a big issue as well, is that it's sort of, yeah, that it's, there may never be those kinds of images around and we need to help people understand that actually that's still mountain biking going in your local woods is still mountain biking.
Um, otherwise you'd say that half the UK doesn't mount bikes. We haven't got flipping mountains. It's sort of, yeah.
Rhona: know, exactly. It's silly, isn't it?
Vicky Balfour: Yeah. It's, it's, yeah, it's a lot of marketing responsibility.
Rhona: And how, so you said, you mentioned as well that you ended up being a mechanic for, what was it, chain reactions and you
Vicky Balfour: Mm
Rhona: cool work. How
Vicky Balfour: Oh yeah,
Rhona: Was this just you slowly chipping away and you worked your way
Vicky Balfour: no, it was pure fluke. I, so I worked with a gorgeous guy called Matt McInerney in, in my local bike shop, and he was from Northern Ireland, which of course is where chain reaction is from originally or was from originally. And so he was so chain reaction used to get him to go and work at Sea Otter in America and MCG Avalanche and other events that they did.
Um, and they needed a French speaking mechanic. And I speak relatively good French and I'm a mechanic, so it was, he was like, get my.
Rhona: there anything you can't do? Wow.
Vicky Balfour: a lot I can't do, I'm sure. And there's an awful lot of things I do badly. I just tend to give things a go.
Rhona: That's brilliant.
Vicky Balfour: Yeah. So it was, uh, that was incredible. And so I, those were really special times. We had like a team of, we called ourselves sort of event nomads that we all came together to put on the chain reaction events.
Um, and they were amazing. Really. I missed those that time so much. And because yeah, you, you relied on each other. You, you would be away, you'd literally, you'd turn up, you'd do your event mechanics, so people would come through with problems that they'd picked up on the mountain. You'd fix them, they'd go off, and then you could go cycling before and after work.
So it was, yeah, it was incredible. So yeah, I loved that. Really loved doing that. Um, I miss that a lot
Rhona: I love that you did that. You did that. It's just so cool. But also, I love that you did, uh, you know, that you did make that space for yourself. That must have been so good for you. I bet that you, when you came back from things like that, you must have just been, you know, had the, the space, the time you needed filled up your cup and you could just give so much to everybody else.
Vicky Balfour: Yeah, completely. It was, and it was the ideal way of working. I think that's where it's sort of, I've struggled to find a way since then of making. Mechanics work in my life. Um, so I mean, I obviously do all my own mechanics and I do mechanics for friends and I sort of, uh, things like my, my brother and his family live in Germany, so recently I've been doing videos for his kids on sort of, and his wife on how to take their bike apart and things, which is great 'cause they can then have their own bespoke videos and, um, but yeah, but it's, yes, it is making, that is the reality of life in my world is, is that it's very hard to do a nine to five and it's very hard to make work fit within my caring responsibilities.
And that sort of, that's where really the outdoors still very much gives me that relief from. From the, it's, I mean, it's, it's definitely, it's an issue and there's a grief, there's huge grief that you just, at the moment is still very much hidden under a, a concrete shell like Chernobyl or something. It's sort of that I will, and I'm slowly beginning to feel ready to address, but it's, that is that grief is there and the outdoors gives you that space to just step away and not have to worry about it and just, yeah, just be, um, yeah.
Rhona: You've learned a lot and you've got a lot of balance it seems now, but is there a time where you did the balance didn't work and things swung too far, you know, and that you didn't take the time for yourself and that meant that you did kind of start to burn out? I guess
Vicky Balfour: Mm. It, and it's, I still do, you are, you are talking to Vicky who's, um, uh, in sort of. Week seven of a new therapist. Life is good. It's, yeah, I mean, my mental health definitely. Oh, I've, yeah. Burnout is something that I really struggle with. It's sort of, because I've had a lot of, yeah, I mean, I've lived with depression since our first child, Henry was, since I was pregnant with him, basically.
Um, because Henry was born with life-threatening allergies and anaphylaxis, and so sort of, I went straight into parenting with having to, yeah, having to rush back to nursery. 'cause they'd given him some yogurt or, oh, it was just, yeah. I mean, it's, it's, it's, and I still, yeah, as you can see, I, I still very much.
I'm very controlled in how I talk about these things because at the moment it's still, it's still hidden raw, securing myself. So yes, my mental health definitely goes up and down and burnout is something, and I was thinking about it. I was listening to, um, I was listening to Harry Clark. I was watching on the guy who won traitors and he'd done something where he'd gone to Rome and he was talking about his depression and he was sort of saying how his Mum had come home from work and then looked after him and he just couldn't get up and he couldn't do this.
And I was just thinking how different it was, that sort of, and questioning whether I, whether my depression was, um, points where I've been very, very low. And I just think, but I still had to function. And that's the difference is that you still, no matter what state you are in, you still have to function for other people.
Um, and I'm incredibly lucky that Al my husband. Understands when I have a, have a sort of a big drop in my mental health and he just supports me. Um, and that is, that's incredible. And I have sort of, and actually Henry and Cece understand as well now, 'cause they're sort of 23 and 20 and they, Cece will sort of say, 'cause she has very repetitive questioning sometimes.
And she's sort of, she now actually knows to say, can you deal with this mum? It's like, I'm just like, no, not now. And she's like, okay. She'll go off and question somebody else about her diary. And it's sort of, but yes, I think it's, again, I think we, we are, by pulling the family in, that is the way that I manage to cope.
But it's not perfect. I don't manage my mental health perfectly. I'm, it's still a work in progress. But things like just getting out to the woods, having a sit down, watching a view. I, I was thinking the other day, 'cause I rode with some friends and they were riding really fast and I was like, oh God, I'm really fit but this is hard.
And so I thought, right next time I go riding on my own, I'm gonna try riding really fast. I realized I just didn't enjoy it 'cause I couldn't look at everything that was going past me. And I was like, well actually there's no point, is there? I can, I can ride fast if I need to, but actually what I need for me is just that complete sort of absorption of everything natural around me and that decompresses me.
So,
Rhona: that's a brilliant message, isn't it? That you don't have to do it the way that other people are doing
Vicky Balfour: yeah.
Rhona: again, we're sold this idea that like, it can only do it if you can do it well or
Vicky Balfour: Yeah.
Rhona: you always should be wanting more, better, faster. There's no, you know, but actually if you just want to go and mooch about, and that makes you feel good and
Vicky Balfour: Yeah.
Rhona: certainly is very healthy for you, then that's fantastic.
And I don't, I don't ever want people to be deterred because that's the way they want to do it.
Vicky Balfour: Yeah, exactly. I think it is, it's so important that we just allow people to do things the way they want and to be who they want to be.
Rhona: Yeah, absolutely. It sounds like you have an amazing way of managing things. I know that you're saying, you know, that there, that it, you're not on top of it all the time, but I don't think that any of us are ever, nobody out there is on top of it all the time and we're all dealing with our own separate thing.
Vicky Balfour: Hmm.
Rhona: you know, if this is your thing, then that, then that's okay. Um, I think that what you said about the fact that you have to cope is a really interesting thing. And I've had this conversation with some friends recently about how some people. You know, have to what for whatever reason, stay more functional than others. Um, and, you know, yes, I'm sure there would be a point where even that wouldn't be possible. And I think that sometimes those people are really at risk actually, because then from the outside, it's your mental health or your struggles aren't seen as easily because you're like, well, they're coping, they're managing, look, they're
Vicky Balfour: Yeah.
Rhona: their kids at school and they're still picking them up, you know? Um, and so that does means maybe you won't get as much help and support sometimes, um, especially in a system like the NHS, uh, you know, you know, if we're talking the extreme level where you might need support through that, if you are still functional, you don't stand a chance of getting help through the NHS.
Vicky Balfour: Yeah, well, yes and no. It's funny you don't stand it from your, from sort of specialist services, but when I was at my absolute lowest about sort of eight years ago, my GP was phenomenal and she saw me once a week, and she communicated with, with sort of, she just gave me that space and she was the one who got me through it.
Um, and I think that's where the NHS does have the ability to, to do those sort of very special, it's not easy, but when you really need it, they are there. And if you manage to get, communicate with the person, um. Then that, then that was, yeah. I mean, I, I completely credit our GP for, she was phenomenal when I needed her and it was sort of, yes, it didn't look like classic support, um, through sort of mental health services, but it was what I needed at the time.
Um, so yes, it is. But I agree. I think, I think the bits, the people who look like they're coping are probably the ones you do need to be most wary of. I mean, I always think nobody goes through life unscathed. You don't. Life is, and anyone who thinks that you can get through life without any pain or anything.
Um, either hasn't come across it yet or is totally deluded.
Rhona: Yeah, no, I, I do agree. I, I have this thing where I say everybody gets their thing, you know, and
Vicky Balfour: Yeah,
Rhona: to the right people, I think that's what they need to hear, to kind of accept that
Vicky Balfour: yeah,
Rhona: what they're experiencing in that time.
Vicky Balfour: yeah.
Rhona: not everybody, that isn't the right thing for everybody, but some people, I think, you know, to know that, okay, like, I'm not unlucky.
I'm not,
Vicky Balfour: No.
Rhona: not been picked by the world to receive this one nasty thing. Like,
Vicky Balfour: Yeah.
Rhona: will have
Vicky Balfour: Yeah.
Rhona: It will be different for all of us.
Vicky Balfour: And I think there are, there are positives, not necessarily positives, but there are, there are things that we learn from these situations and uh, I think it makes it our lives. It enhances our lives. And it might be huge pain. I mean, for example, CeCe one of her close friends, Mallie died about three years ago.
Um, and she was 16 and. The, the what that has done for Cece, whilst on the one hand it's given her huge grief, she then had counseling and therapy through a sort of a family support worker at school who's a counselor. And Cece has now become somebody who deals with other people's grief unbelievably well.
And she's so, because of her learning disabilities and who she is as a person, she's so empathetic and she will just ask you and she will hug you and she will say, it's okay to be sad. And so, but that wouldn't have happened if Mallie hadn't died. And whilst it's. Awful that Mally died and heartbreaking and none of us would want that.
There is something that's come out of it that is making other people's lives better. So it's, yeah, I think, and I think that's the world that we live in with disabilities is we are very much more aware of the fragility of life, but also the inevitability of some things.
Rhona: And you said when, obviously when CeCe was a lot younger, you just had appointments all the time. I guess now that's less so, but that's another thing that I think is a huge, you really touched on it. Appointment burden is huge.
Vicky Balfour: Yeah.
Rhona: the fact that
Vicky Balfour: It's in.
Rhona: be in all these places with all these different people and they only know about their little bit.
And so you're supposed to remember who's doing what and that's, that must have been, you know, you became a parent your second child and you know, there's arguments out there about this, but some peoples do say that it gets much harder with two rather than easier, you know, and then you had to suddenly be doing all that.
That must have been a really difficult time logistically.
Vicky Balfour: Yes, it was. It was, yeah, I think it was, I mean, it was, it was peculiar but then again, I think this is where I've learned that actually we can all learn to do different things because you become an expert in your child and you understand, and you learn about all these things.
And I think you realize that actually we can all learn new stuff and we can all learn different things. It just takes time. And yes, I mean, we were forced to be into that world. Um. I mean now it's different CeCe's. Um, the main thing I have to do now is take her to and from her day service.
But actually that's great because, um, we, it's right where I love to ride. It's where I love to walk, so it's great. I can just, it works for me. Um, taking her down, taking her down there. But it, that is an hour in the morning, an hour in the evening by the time I've done, or an hour in the afternoon by the time I've done the return.
So again, it just cuts. It defines my day basically. I can't, yeah.
Rhona: Yeah. Yeah. There's no way you could work, like you
Vicky Balfour: No,
Rhona: to five
Vicky Balfour: no.
Rhona: You just wouldn't
Vicky Balfour: Yeah,
Rhona: and I, and if she didn't get to go there, presumably her quality of life would be much worse. So you, you'd feel, you know, super conflict,
Vicky Balfour: Yeah.
Rhona: in, it's a very tricky position.
Vicky Balfour: It is, and the only alternative is that she moves into, into a home or into a into, and that in the long run, that will probably be the right solution. But I, I'm always very wary of being, of feeling any sort of negativity about the work, about the situation I'm in now, because I don't want her to have to, to move out or, um, because I love, I love having sort of the family around us.
I would live in a big commune with my family if I could.
Rhona: Yeah. Well it seems like you've done a good job of keeping them nearby, so you did something right, that's for sure.
Vicky Balfour: It's, yeah, it's def it's their dad's cooking. I think Dad's cooking and our activities.
Rhona: Oh, well, there you go. Oh, that's so good. So tell me about, you do a few, few other bits and bobs. Am I right that you do some writing? Is that right?
Vicky Balfour: Yeah. So I did, um, I did write for a long time for, uh, MBUK. Um, I did their sort of, uh, yeah, I did the, but I was behind the scenes mostly, um, doing their how to guides. So again, it was, I loved it because it was, you had to explain a mechanical activity, so a job, a task within a really small word count, but you had to explain it in a way that a lay person could understand it.
And that was, I love doing that because it's such, I think because of the, sort of, the way I've, the children I've brought up and things, communication is so critical. Um, and it unlocks so many doors. So, uh, yeah. So that was brilliant. Um. Unfortunately, I think all their budgets changed and that went back in house.
So, um,
Rhona: fair
Vicky Balfour: but yeah, it's, and I've done a few guides for bike radar on sort of adaptive cycles and things. So yeah, it's, yeah, but I think writing is something I would like to do more as time permits. It's something I enjoy that I love. Again, it's a bit like cycling. It's that I love the feeling of playing with words in my mouth.
So again, creating a story, creating an experience, and showing somebody the potential of getting out and, and sort of doing something different. So we will see.
Rhona: a very, you're very, very good communicator. Um, so I'm sure whatever you write in the future will be fantastic. The,
Vicky Balfour: Thank you.
Rhona: you would also have, you, have you ever, you'd be an amazing coach. Have you ever thought about coaching? I mean, not to add another thing to your already enormous pile of things, but just throwing it out there.
Vicky Balfour: Yeah, I have, during lockdown, I developed a thing called Resilient Riders, which, um. I need to re-look at. But, um, and it was basically the idea was that I took a group of women and it was a bit like couch to 5K almost, but for cycling. And so this group of women on, so we did some sessions every couple of weeks, and we started with literally just a little cycle ride.
And then we did cycle through the woods and we did a cycle along the sea front. And I remember one of the rides, one of the women said to me, she said, I think my, I think my watch is broken. I was like, why? And she said, well, it says I've done 10 K. And I said, well, you have done 10 k. I've never done 10 anything in my life.
And I was just like, oh my goodness. So good. And I think that's something I would love to, I mean, I, and I did teach mechanics for quite a while as well. And the problem I got to, and again, this was, comes back to the burnout, was that I found I just couldn't, especially with CC transitioning to adult life, where suddenly we were having to look at sort of powers of attorney and, and there was a lot of mental load with helping CC transition from school to adult life as well as paperwork.
And I just didn't have enough to give. And so I've, I've definitely put a hold on things, um. For a year or two whilst I've sort of, yeah, getting her through that. But yes, going forwards, I think that kind of showing people the, the potential that they have and what they can do is definitely something I want to sort of look at going forwards, because I think people are capable of so much more than they realize it's,
Rhona: see you had the, the words that I didn't, that's exactly it. You, I, I, I have chatted to you just for under an hour and I feel like yes you have that you can draw out of people their best. I feel sure of that. That's fantastic. But doing that is also quite exhausting.
Vicky Balfour: yeah.
Rhona: so, you know, I
Vicky Balfour: Yeah.
Rhona: it's good that you're cautious not to dive into, um, you know, that world too, too quickly because you already give a lot to other people.
Vicky Balfour: Yes, that's exactly it. And I do remember there was a point I realized, uh, it was probably was about a, it was probably about a year ago now, and I just literally realized that I didn't have any more to give, I just couldn't give any more to anyone else. Um, and so that's where it, since then I've been sort of very much, I, I do a lot of sewing and creating and I, and so I've learned that I really, and I really respect that in myself now, whereas I think previously I felt that I had to go out and be in society and be in the world and do something that other people recognized.
I'm now far more content to just. Fill my own cup quietly in my way. And if I share it, that's fine, but if I don't, that's also fine because it's just feeding and nourishing me. Um, and I think that's probably my concept of rest actually is, is sort of, yeah. Is is around doing that. It's not necessarily, it's, yes, it's doing those things that nourish me.
Um
Rhona: Yeah. That's so interesting, isn't it? I think it's kind of like what you said before about the intention or like why are you actually doing something? Um, because sometimes those activities don't seem as appealing on the surface because it's not what everybody else is doing. You won't anybody else.
You won't tick any boxes, you won't get
Vicky Balfour: Yeah.
Rhona: a track, you know, I mean, you might
Vicky Balfour: Yes.
Rhona: in that. You're make, you might have a, made a finished product, but you're not really, you know, progressing on a
Vicky Balfour: Yeah.
Rhona: Um, which does you don't need to do. But we, we often get stuck in the mindset that we do, don't we?
Vicky Balfour: Yes. Exactly. Exactly. And it's sort of, and I think it's fine as well to let ideas germinate and sit on them. And it's sort of like I, I've got this dream one day. So we live on the NCN one cycle path that goes from Dover up to Shetland. And so literally I come outta my gate or, and metaphorically turn left basically, and I could cycle to Scotland.
And, and I sort of, and that's something that it, one day I would love to do. But I think I also just enjoy sitting there thinking, well, would it, would it satisfy me if I did it in chunks and logistically how would that work and, and at what point and how long would it actually take me? And looking at a map.
And, and so actually there's, there's enjoyment in the plotting of it as much as there is in the doing.
Rhona: So much. Yeah. For, for me personally, an adventure is mostly about the planning, I think.
Vicky Balfour: Yeah.
Rhona: I think I seem to enjoy that bit and more, and then I'm often slightly disappointed when I get to do the hour. mean, not that often, but sometimes, you know,
Vicky Balfour: Yeah.
Rhona: like, the planning and preparing is really fun. This is all right.
Vicky Balfour: Yeah. It's, it's, I mean, it's, that was, I think that was what I found with the Badger divide. I'm determined to go back sometime and do it again and see if it was just, it was the wrong time for me, or, um, yeah, it's,
Rhona: Maybe
Vicky Balfour: yes.
Rhona: the right weather and the right, you know, the right sort of conditions and the right headspace. I think as well.
Vicky Balfour: yeah,
Rhona: definitely think that going out on your own into the middle of nowhere with your bike when you're in the wrong headspace, well can just
Vicky Balfour: yeah,
Rhona: work at all.
Vicky Balfour: yeah, yeah. No.
Rhona: and that's also okay I think, to go home from that and that's not a failure.
If you needed to go home and have a bath instead, that's fine.
Vicky Balfour: Yes, exactly. Exactly. It's, yeah, totally. It was interesting. I was doing a, um, I did a ride with a group called Field Trippers who are from Essex. Um, and it was in London, it was about about six weeks ago. And, um, it was fantastic. And it was basically you start at the Tower of London and we rode out along the Thames and then back, and so went through all the places that we'd lived when Al was a medical student, and then down to where we lived when we lived, moved slightly out of Central London and then came out and saw bits of London that I didn't even know existed.
But there was one point on that where I think we were probably about 80. Probably 70 or 80 K in. And we were heading back and it was into the wind. And I was miserable. And I was hungry. And this woman came who I'd been chatting to on the ride and she came and sat at a sort of road alongside me and she was like, just stop, stop these thoughts.
And I just thought, who the hell are you to tell me to stop these thoughts? Anyway, she did manage to we, she then said, right, no talk about something good. I was like, okay, I'll give it a go. And we did. And it was incredible because it totally changed my mindset and changed. And if I'd been on my own, that ride would've been miserable for the last 30 km probably would've ended up finding a train somewhere.
Um, but she made such a difference in that sort of few kilometers that we rode together. And then she ended up riding with another person and so on. And I, I caught up with my friend Ru and it was. But it was just that it, she showed me in that moment that you can change your mindset and the power of riding with other people.
Um, and it was brilliant. Yeah.
Rhona: person in the right moment
Vicky Balfour: Yeah.
Rhona: it around.
Vicky Balfour: Yes.
Rhona: once you've done that a few times, you can learn to do it a bit more for yourself as well. 'cause you, you realize, oh, I did pull myself out of that
Vicky Balfour: Yeah,
Rhona: so the next time you're in a hole, you're like, I've got no excuse.
I know I can get out of this.
Vicky Balfour: exactly.
Rhona: it last time.
Vicky Balfour: Yes. Yeah, exactly. It's sort of, and it's a bit like my Mum always used to say to me when I was a, when I was a child and things, and she's like, don't worry. Tomorrow's another day. And it's like, well, that kilometer's another kilometer when by the time we get there, it might be different sort of.
Yeah.
Rhona: exactly. I know sometimes when I'm feeling rubbish I have, I just like s even if I really don't feel like it as a smile, just put a smile on my face. It's funny, it kind of like seeps into you and you start to
Vicky Balfour: Yes.
Rhona: happy and it's just
Vicky Balfour: Yeah.
Rhona: how amazing that is. Or like, you know, if you like got your head down, you're fed up lifting your head up, it just, and just like actually, and then you see everything again.
Oh yeah. It's quite nice out here.
Vicky Balfour: Yes. Yes, exactly. It's so true. So true. It's,
Rhona: little things you can do to trick yourself, but it is amazing what we can do as humans to, you know, work around our brains and to make
Vicky Balfour: hmm.
Rhona: do things.
Vicky Balfour: Yeah, I, it is, and I think that's the joy of cycling especially, is that you can do it. You can, it's not like you have to go and climb Everest or you don't have to do you, you don't have to do particularly, um. Difficult or extreme things in order to push your body and learn about your body and so on.
Sometimes just being cold and wet and hungry and tired teaches you so much. And I think we forget that. I think, again, I think it's part of this whole sort of thing that we, adventures have to be massive and big adventures don't, adventures can be going and just exploring in your backyard or your local woods or whatever, but just take away that level of comfort.
It's like taking away the suspension on your bike makes everything feel more sort of raw than it is because it's sort of, yeah, you're just taking away that, that sort of support, I suppose. Um.
Rhona: I know when I'm trying to sell people on exercise, I tell them, oh, you don't, it doesn't have to be painful and it can be really fun. Um, and, and that is true. You a hundred percent can be healthy and active with those things, those things being true. But I think if you really want to learn the really deep, dark places in your brain, you wanna actually go and face some of your demons and sort of really know yourself, then it maybe does have to be a bit uncomfortable.
Vicky Balfour: Yeah, I think that's true, but I think if you've got someone who like me whose everyday life teaches you a lot about resilience and you've had to go,
Rhona: true.
Vicky Balfour: it's, I think, I think it's horses for courses. I think it depends on what the person's life is like. It's sort of, yeah. And that's not saying. And yes, I mean absolutely I think you can learn a lot about yourself, but I think, uh, the exercise can also be an escape from that hardship.
Um.
Rhona: Yes, exactly. That's it. Exactly. And that like really is kind of the crux of a little bit, this podcast is that like for one person
Vicky Balfour: Yeah.
Rhona: outside is just purely an escape and it's relaxing and it doesn't have to be hard at all because their life is hard
Vicky Balfour: Yes.
Rhona: and that, and that's a fantastic, and for another person, maybe actually life is quite comfortable, but they still, but that they
Vicky Balfour: Yeah.
Rhona: that they really struggle and they need to go and work hard
Vicky Balfour: Yeah.
Rhona: do some of that, you know, like to actually have a purpose and have something that keeps 'em going.
Vicky Balfour: Yeah, totally. And I think that's exactly, and also different stages of your life, each scenario will be true. And that's, and just being able to have that, to know that there's somewhere you can go. I mean, so again, this ride in London, it was only one day, but I was so tired afterwards and that felt so good.
It was just
Rhona: Yeah,
Vicky Balfour: know that I'd ridden for 10 hours and I was absolutely exhausted was bliss. But also knowing that I was about to get the train home and get a lift back to the house. So
Rhona: that's what, um, Phoebe Snedden said. She said that she needs to just like every so often be so, so, so exhausted that she knows she couldn't possibly lift a finger and then she's just like, at peace.
Vicky Balfour: yes, yes. I think that's probably why Phoebe and I are such good friends.
Rhona: Yeah,
Vicky Balfour: Yeah, exactly. It's, yes, that is, and it's, to know that you can push your body that far is bliss. It's, it's incredible. Especially the older you get. Um, I mean it's, yeah. Now I think I'm probably stronger now than I've ever been. And I love that feeling that I can just really, and, but I know that it takes me probably an hour for my legs to warm up, sort of.
But once I'm going, then it's fine. But yeah. But I think, and I think that's the incredible thing about exercise. Like you say, it can be so many different things for different people, but at the end of the day, it is just the joy of our bodies are designed to move. And letting them do that is just bliss.
It's,
Rhona: Yeah, absolutely. I noticed that while we've been doing this, you are wearing a t-shirt that says No, and thought that was kind of funny actually. Maybe relevant, just to remind you sometimes.
Vicky Balfour: yeah, well it's, yeah, it's funny. It's actually, it's, no, so it's an island in France, so it's the, it's the abbreviation for that island, but yes, inadvertently it is, no, it should be, I should have it done. Everything. No,
Rhona: sometimes it's good to just remind ourselves. So, you know,
Vicky Balfour: exactly.
Rhona: a hard stance on that.
Vicky Balfour: Yeah. No, I'm just showing my affinity to France, so, but yes, it is
Rhona: funny.
Vicky Balfour: to,
Rhona: Brilliant. Well, Vicky, I think we should, uh, leave, leave the podcast there. That was so amazing getting to know you and your story a bit. Um, 'cause I've come across a lot of the work you've done and advocacy you've done and some cool projects you've been involved with, but I didn't really know much about you yourself, so, and it's been really, really nice to hear about it.
And I honestly think so many people are gonna resonate with a lot of parts of your story. So thank you for sharing so much.
Vicky Balfour: Oh, thank you so much for having me and giving me the opportunity because it's, I think we're all in life together, and if, if, if anyone can feel if, if anyone gets anything good out of listening and knowing that they're not alone and that they can do things, then that makes me really, really happy.
Sometimes guests say to me that they felt the recording was a bit of a therapy session, but I think this time I felt like Vicky was giving me the therapy. I can see why she was so highly requested, and I feel very lucky to have gotten to know her that little bit more in this short time. I hope you've enjoyed this episode and maybe even got the chance to listen to it while meandering through your local woods or working on a craft project.
If you want to keep up with all things Rest Days, follow us on Instagram at restdayscommunity or check out the website restdayscommunity.com. I'll see you next week for another hour all about rest